First Remicade Day

As many of you may know, my Crohns is at a horrible point and I have been given limited options on what is next...so Remicade infusions it is with hopes of NO surgeries in the near future.  My flare-up this time is one of a kind with all sorts of complications that makes life so frusturating.  I know I'm not myself currently but I am hoping and praying that this "MIRACLE" drug does the trick and turns my life around.  One can only hope right?

Remicade is suppose to help put Crohns in remission and relieves symptoms (pain, diarrhea, fatigue, etc) by binding and blocking the effects of TNF-alpha, a protein involved in the inflammation process.  And as Crohns is know for my intestines are inflammed like no other.  Lets just say they are "pissed off" right now which makes me "very very mad!"

So today was the day to start my infusions.  As a health care professional, I could only think of the worst things imaginable that could happen to me and not the positives.  I think Brian thought I was crazy because I couldn't quit talking about the bad and what if's!  I arrived at the hospital and checked in to get my famous arm band on so everyone knows who I am.  I was taken to an infusion room with a reclining chair and tv and the dreaded IV pump.  I felt so awkward when I was in the area because here I am 28 years old and all of these other individuals are old people or people that truely look sick.  What was I doing there? I have a hard time thinking of myself as in the same classification of them when honestly I am probably in a worse position then them :(

Heres how Remicade day went:
--Checked in at 8am
--Got my IV started by an amazing nurse (went to high school with him so that helped) and hooked up to blood pressure cuff (BP every 15 minutes while getting the infusion)
--Given some Tylenol and reminded of option for Benadryl if I would have a reaction. To be honest I was hoping for the Benadryl so I would sleep part of the infusion and not worry a bit...it went ok nonetheless
--Infusion begins...This is where I felt like my heart was going to jump out of my chest and my throat was going to close :) Once the infusion began, it was a cinch. 
--The infusion lasted about 3 hours with some awesome visitors, my husband and of course, daytime TV. 

Overall, the Remicade process wasn't a bad one and I felt ok afterwards.  I went home and took a nap and just felt very nauseated but overall could function.  Lets hope the rest of them are the same.
I will get my next infusion in 2 weeks, then 4 weeks, then 8 weeks and with no "end date" in my treatment.  I'm crossing my fingers and praying for this to be the drug I need. 

Vegas Recap....Kristi Style :)

I already sincerely apologize for my lack of blogging the past week! Don't think I haven't thought about it every day as I have I just have not found the time and ambition even though I am overjoyed with all I have to tell you.  I have had to re-evaluate my Crohns this week and make some choices that scare me and many that are undecided because of the "unknown" but Im not going to tell you about that today...maybe tomorrow.  Today is the day of Recap Vegas Style!

Friday 6am-Sioux Falls airport- Time to leave!
Let me just say I look extremely tired with some big curly hair but we were so excited.  Hard to leave our husbands and children but was so excited to experience what was next!  Well the beginning of our trip did not turn out as expected.  We ended up sitting in the airplane in Sioux Falls for 1 hour because someone forgot to put the water in the toilets!  How ironic don't you think!!!  I'm glad they put water in them just in case I needed to go but of course I didn't because I was to busy freaking out about missing our plane in Denver.  Thank goodness for calm Dani who continued to smile and say "they will just wait for us, right?"  I kept thinking I hope your right yet knew better.  We landed at 807 and our plane left at 808 :(  BOO DENVER!  So we thank goodness got on the next flight to Vegas at 950am.  Ate some McDonalds and prayed that our luggage made it to Vegas. 

 

We made it to Vegas with no hiccups including getting our luggage and soon the butterflies started in the cab which by the way is outlandishing expensive! $25!  And the driver work a long leather jacket with his hair greased back...Kinda thought I was riding with the Mafia. 

 

  Now we finally get to meet this "virtual" team whom we have only talked to via email.  What do you expect?! Are we who they think? Do we hug? High five? Smile?  Well I do what I do best and smile and hug!  It was awesome to finally meet them.  After checking in we went to the Expo and got our race packet and saw all the millions of vendors.  It was so overwhelming the amount of things you can use for running.  I was thinking "Crap, I have no clue I needed all this!"  I of course found the booth with all the sparkle hence our sparkle arm warmers and my sparkle headband.  And I found a workout tank top that says "Blood, sweat, and sparkle"!  How true is that?!  I was in heaven :)  I will post a pic when I finally wear it.  After the expo we rested for a bit and then met our team to go down to Fremont Street.  That was definetly a great bonding experience that we won't forget.  I swear we saw LMFAO performing, at some Subway, saw a man dressed in a bridesmaids dress with boobs, a girl with a pink see thru fish net dress and Santas "ho's".  Fremont street didn't disappoint as neither did the bus ride there and home! 

 

 

Saturday:  This was our day of sleeping in and shopping at H&M and Forever 21.  I am so glad we don't have those stores in Sioux Falls as I would be broke but there stuff is so so cute!  Saturday evening was the inspirational pasta party.  I can honestly say the amount of love and warmth I felt from that party was something I have never experienced before.  I had a hard time holding back tears as we went thru a tunnel of people just cheering for us, 1500 people who fundraised for Crohn's research many who don't even have the disease.  I couldn't believe it.  All of these people are helping me in some way and all with such pride and grace.  I mean who gets up in the morning saying I'm going to start raising money for people who have problems with their "poopers"!  Its a hard selling point! Words are indescrible for the feelings and I am forever grateful I will have that in my heart forever.  The speakers were outstanding...the director of CCFA, an 8 year old Crohn's patient, Mike McCready's wife from Pearl Jam, Next seasons Bachelor.  I am so excited for next year! I met some amazing new friends and fellow Crohnies which is so beneficial when you want to scream and shout about your disease!  HI JENNY!

RACE DAY!  Dani said it all too way.  This morning was very somber and quiet in our room.  Grabbed our breakfast, ate in mostly silence and both kept looking at each other thinking "we are going to run 13.1 miles in less than 6 hours.  Holy crap!  I'm going to puke!"  I had a stomach ache all day and of course used the bathroom at least 10 times and all I thought was please dont have this happen on the strip!  Once we were all bussed to our race we sat in our corral area for at least 30 minutes before we actually started our race and Dani stood in line with me at the portapotty so I could get my "nervous" peeing done.  We started running aroun 510pm with a wind advisory.  We both thought at least the wind can push us for a bit.  The race itself was fantastic.  I felt honestly great the whole time and had a HUGE SMILE on my face which surprised me.  It was the greatest feeling to know that you were accomplishing something big with all of these strangers cheering for us along the strip.  I think it was our awesome tutus that drew the crowd towards us.  Glad we met up with awesome Coach Erin on Mile 8 because that was the ghetto area of Fremont street with limited lights and she was a great encouragement booster.  Once I hit Mile 10 I can say I thought I was going to die....I didn't however....WE CROSSED THE FINISH LINE TOGETHER WITH A SMILE!  I felt like my legs where going to fall off and my body was going to fall over but it didn't.  We got our medal, drank some fluid and basically stared at everything in awe that we just completed this amazing experience! And it was more than we could have asked for.  My amazing uncle John from here was at the finish line which warmed my heart knowing that kind of love and support I have surrounding me in good times and in bad!  It was so wonderful to see him :)  I also was so excited that as we checked in to the Team Challenge tent saying we were off the race and safe I met this awesome blogger Lauren whom I found via her blog about a month before.  I was so bummed because I knew she was in Vegas but hadn't met her yet and off course the last day and literally last hours I met her!  It was great to see you and your orange hair Lauren! 

Ok I think I probably have took up enough of your time as I could talk forever about this experience!  I am thankful for the love and support I have from all of you and plan to continue to be an advocate for my disease during the good times and bad! 

What?! Its Over!!!

I cannot believe that its over! What am I gonna do with myself? Train for another one! I loved it, I am definitely running more 1/2 marathons next year. I was a little confused when we stepped off the bus and saw the crowd, wondering why in the hell did we start with such a big race! Its the second largest race in Nevada! If I haven't told you yet, there was 50,000 people running! 1,500 Team Challenge runners!!! Crazy!!! I asked Kristi why we didn't start with a small one and move forward.....Go big or go home!!! After the race started, I couldn't imagine running any other one. The atmosphere was amazing! The strip was crowded with people cheering for you! Bands every mile to keep you going, watching people get married! And a extremely large preying mantis with fire coming out of its antennas!!! It was crazy!!!
Our weekend in Vegas will be a weekend I'm sure either of us will forget. We met some pretty awesome people there from our team Minnesota. The Inspirational pasta party was well.......inspirational! I really cant imagine running without running for a cause. I hope I am able to get on Team Challenge again. Maybe next time Ill be running in Hawaii! All the teams from Team Challenge had such great energy, it was so amazing being in the same room with them. Hearing how much people had raised for this cause was also incredible. One person alone raised $70,000!!! Can you believe that?! I want to do that!!
Sunday morning when we woke up was pretty somber. We really didn't have much to say to each other except...."I'm nervous." I'm getting nervous now." I'm really nervous" We then met our team at 200 in the lobby and got our team picture and then walked to the buses that took us to the beginning of the race. I have never seen so much orange in my life!!! Or so many port-a-potties! There was pink ones too! Kristi and I were in corral 28 with two other of our teammates. We had to walk about a mile or two from there to get to the starting line. We lined up at 430 and when we reached the starting line it was 510! They were letting waves of people go every 45-50 seconds! I am very proud to say that we beat the time we had in our heads and that we didn't walk!!! Mile 10 was the worst, but when we rounded the corner there was the strip again! And we made the strip our bitch!!! We finished at 2hrs 33min then had to walk a mile to our Team Challenge tent to let them know we were alive. Then we had to go pick up our bag of personals in UPS truck, ONE UPS truck had 1,000 bags in it in NO particular order! So when we were there to pick it up you had to give them your bib number and then they would dig thru 1,000 bags to find that number! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! We watched the Ballagio fountains 3 times!!!! So once we finally got our bags we had to walk another mile or 2 to our hotel room! Once we made it there and showered we went to a pizzeria and got our supper!! How enjoyable was that!!!! Pizza had never tasted so good!!

Thanks again to EVERYONE that helped us get there! I hope we did not disappoint!

A little motivation

This is the song I have been listening to, to get me motivated!! LOVE IT!!

Tomorrow! Tomorrow!!!

I cant believe we are actually leaving for Vegas tomorrow morning. We have been thinking about this since August and now here we are! I'm just gonna start rambling on about what I'm thinking, so it might be a little all over the place :)
I'm a little nervous about the race, i have been slipping a little bit in the training department :/ I have heard though that there is so many distractions there that get you pumped up and you continue on. I have been watching the videos on YouTube and cant believe I am going to get to experience it too! I'm so ready for it all!!
Thank you to everyone that donated and helped us out with our fundraising. We truly appreciated it!
I almost teared up last night as I was thinking about putting Trav and Kristi's name on my singlet. Its an honor to do this for so many people. I hope I can do this again, its just an amazing feeling!
We finally get to meet our teammates from Minn.! We have been emailing them since Aug and now we get to meet them face to face, so we are both pretty excited about that. We are all going zip lining Friday night as a team!! Whoop! Whoop!

We will be blogging again tomorrow to update you all and maybe throughout the wknd. I hope we can get some good pictures to share with you all. I'm having a hard time finding room in my suitcase for a camera
Maybe on Sunday you can all say a little prayer in hopes that Kristi is feeling well enough to run 13.1 miles.
THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!! Wish us luck!!!!!

4 days and counting!

4 DAYS AND COUNTING.......LET ME JUST SAY I AM SO EXCITED AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT...I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW I THINK LIKE IT!  Ok thats enough singing :) 

 

I am really praying that this is a fresh new week for me and going to Las Vegas will be just what I need to get over this slump I am in.  After this great 4 day holiday weekend, I had time to realize how thankful I am for everything around me and how I can't give up on myself because all of those "things" need me and of course I need them. God is just testing my skills and I'm hoping this is his hardest test yet, it can only get easier right?! 

Right now, our biggest dilemma is what are we going to pack?  I think Dani and myself have been going back and forth about what to pack, what are we going to do, how cold is it, tennis shoes and then some, etc...We just can't figure it out!  We will and I know we will look cute the entire time even if its jeans, a jacket and tennis shoes :) 

I have so many mixed emotions currently about this trip that I can't even describe how I am feeling right now.  My stomach is mixed with butterflies, anxiety, and excitment just because I have NO CLUE what we are going to experience.  It can only be awesome I'm sure and I can't wait to tell you all about it! 

10 medications...REALLY!

Well as I told all of you, I met a new GI doctor last Wednesday and have experienced some rapid changes in the past 5 days for both good and bad.  I really really liked her and I think God must have had a reason for pushing me to make that call because she really worked me over to say the least.  I have not been feeling well for the past couple of weeks and have been struggling with that because you know we leave for Las Vegas in 11 days and I can't be down in the dumps for that!  But I have a feeling I'm going to have to take it easy which is ok because I have an extremely supportive friend who will understand when we can't stay out til 2am :) 

So my new GI doctor visited with me about my medications and 14 year history and provided me all sorts of tasks I needed to do in the next couple of days.  All before Vegas!
1. 14 tubes of Labwork...Yes I wrote 14 tubes...I really thought I was going to not have any blood left when she was done
2. A DEXA scan (aka. the old lady bone scan)
3. A colonoscopy in 2 days! Yes too much information already :)
4. A new powder packet to take daily

AND THE RESULTS....
1. Vitamin D level is low (1 medication weekly), iron is low (Vitron C daily) calcium is low (Calcium twice daily), continue multivitamin, OH and my quantiferon (aka TB skin test) was positive which means I have tuberculosis!  Now that was devastating to me...Tuberculosis!  Are you kidding me?!  Well it is latent, so don't worry you can be around me but it was most likely developed from me taking Humira injections which was suppose to be helping my Crohns...Instead it gives me TB!  So now I have to take 2 different medications for 9 months straight and I should be ok.  I guess I have taken ok lightly..
2. Don't know these results yet
3.  Yes it gets worse....My scope was not good.  I have another stricture/narrowing where my last 2 prior bowel obstruction surgeries. :( So my Crohn's is active which is not good for me as we prepare for running 13.1 miles!  She was unable to get her scope thru that narrowing so now I have to drink barium for a MRI to view my small intestine to make sure their is not active Crohn's up there.  She also took some biopsies on areas of interest so we are waiting for those results!

So let's just say in a nut shell...I'm a MESS!  I'm still angry at it but I'm hoping that I can change my focus and look at the positive of this.  God only gives you what you can handle right!  So please keep praying for me as I know you all are!

I wish you only knew.....

Sorry we haven’t wrote anything in a couple of weeks when we were suppose to be blogging for 30 days….Lets just say I haven’t felt the best and life is super crazy as you all know.  We are 14 days away from leaving for Las Vegas and experiencing something that is going to be life changing and I am having a Debby Downer moment!  I currently HATE HATE HATE my Crohn’s and I’m struggling to even type this.  I found this amazing blog a while back called Forward is a pace and she named her intestines and when she was having a rough day she would write to her intestine because it helped relieve what she was feeling…Well I’m going to try that and see if it helps! 

 

I asked the kids what I should name my Crohn’s/intestines and Lily just looked at me weird.  10 minutes later she comes back to me and states “Monster” because it is so mean to you and I am scared of it L  So my intestines are now named Monster.

 

Dear Monster,

I hate what you do to me and to my mind.  You have made my life a living hell the past 2 weeks and it sounds like you are only to get worse and I cannot stand to even think about it.  It drives me insane that I look “fine” on the outside when I have so much pain on the inside.  I always wonder what it would be like to just feel good for once but I honestly don’t remember what that would even feel like.  When people ask me how does it feel, I want to ask how does it feel to feel normal?  I have had 4 stupid surgeries because of you and probably have another one soon on the horizon because you are rearing your ugly head.  WHY do you have to be closing again in the same spot that I had my last 2 surgeries on?  Don’t you understand that my life is to busy to be out for weeks on end….I have 3 kids that need me and a job I love to do.  I don’t feel like its fair that this a continuous battle because I am at my breaking point and ready to give up on you and quit fighting so hard.  Maybe you are doing this right now because you know that I will get another look at things when I am with the Team Challenge crew…I hope my thought is right on that because I need a positive right now!

 

I am so grateful for my parents and all the love and support they have given me especially over the past couple of days.  I know they love me dearly and are scared at the same time but put a smile on their face so I don’t think they are worried.  Its ok to be worried? Because I am extremely worried.  I’m so scared that some day I’m going to not be able to take care of my kids and that just tears me to pieces.  They are the reason I get up everyday yet lately I have not been the mom they probably want.  My mind is 5 million other places than at home with them.

 

Some days I’m surprised Brian listens to me complain about my pain but I think it has become 2^nd nature after 10 years of being together.  However I feel extremely guilty for not being the “normal & healthy” wife that most husbands get to have.  I am the sickly one that is in constant pain, with all sorts of mood changes, tired all the time, have to stop at every store to use the bathroom , and can’t understand why GOD choose me.  I do know that there are days he runs from what he is feeling especially when I’m not feeling well and try’s to avoid discussing it which is ok.  I’m just glad that he has been there for me during my hospitalizations and will take care of the kids when I’m not well.  I don’t know another man that would sit in the bathroom with me and have a conversation.

 

Lets just say Monster you are pissing me off and this is the week that I am suppose to be thankful for what I have.  Well I am extremely thankful for who and what I have around me but not what I have inside me.  I feel like I could type forever about all the negative feelings I currently have but I don’t want to let that occupy me.  Lets hope that over the next couple of days I can gain some positive feelings and I promise I will share them with you!

 

 

I stole this picture shamelessly from Lauren's blog...

 

If you have a minute, check out Lauren's blog...She says it exactly how I feel.

http://www.forwardisapace.com/2012/06/what-i-wish-you-knew/

Telling everything....

So it's Day 4 on our blog posts and we already missed Day 3.  Oopss!  You will just get a 2 for 1...people like those right? 

Day 3:  "I don't know about this, but I would like to".......
Those 10 words have rang true to me just this last week as I have re-evaluated my health and realized I really would like a second opinion on what is right for me.  I'm only 28 years old and hopefully have a whole world ahead of me, I would like to at least feel well 50% of the time.  However, when I think about getting a 2nd opinion, I feel like I am having an affair on my Gastro doctor of 10 years...Is that weird?  Probably, yes because it is my health and my life!  So I did schedule an appointment with a new GI doctor in 2 weeks from now (she's younger and I'm hoping full of new ideas/thoughts) that maybe will work better for me.  And who know's I might still go back to my same GI I have had for 10 years but why not "test the water" for a different feel. I'm crossing my fingers and hope that by me having this "medical affair" it's well worth it!



Day 4: How did you decide what to share?  What do/don't you share?

This sharing idea is a brand new concept to me as I have never talked about my disease so openly before.  Yet the second Dani and myself signed up for Team Challenge there was no turning back when talking about my Crohn's.  I have decided to openly share everything about this "invisible" illness I have except some minor details that many of you will be glad I don't share.  Today is not the best day for me but I will only write positive things as I don't want the negative side of my illness to overcome the positives in my life.  You know that your kids really listen to you when last night when deciding what we wanted for supper I asked Lucas what he would like... He states "Mom lets have pizza for supper because you can go to the bathroom at home!"  He does really listen to me! 

I am so thankful for my amazing 3 children.  They are so intelligent and understand when I don't feel good that we won't be accomplishing much that day but they also make me feel better at the same time.  Lily is my go to girl as she knows as much as I do where each bathroom is in every store/building that we enter.  She knows that sometimes in the middle of shopping we will have to leave the cart where it is and make a mad dash for the restroom.  Its priceless for me when I have all 3 kids in the stall and pray they don't say anything about the smell or what are you doing mom!  Yet I wouldn't change it for the world and I just hope that somebody they know I try my best even when I don't feel like my body can try any harder. 



This card most definetly pertains to you Dani!  You know all to much about me and I wouldn't change any minute of it.  Thank you! 

big Whoops

So I fudged up a little bit. I thought this 30 day post thing was just something Kristi came up with and I could make up my own post.......not the case!!
So here is the REAL Day 2...Find a Quote and Use it As Inspiration

Funny that I got this one, cause I was just on pinterest looking at inspirational quotes. I found one I liked alot and I think a lot of people can relate to this one.

p.s. sorry Kristi I screwed up the post, please forgive me :)

Post 2 of 30 day of Health

Ok, I will give this a shot. It probably wont be very interesting or informative but what the "h", right?

So Kristi has been FREAKING out on what to eat the day before and the day of Race Day (honestly, I dont blame her) :) Anywho, I did some research for her and here are some things I found for you!

Stick to bland diet, rice, pasta, bananas, oatmeal. Also include some protien...peanut butter, fish, ect.
Try to avoid high fiber foods that will cause gas or bloating.

The day before the race try and spread your calories throughout the day, so your eating something every two to three hours. Most of your calories come from carbs, so boost up on those and stay away from JUNK FOOD!!! I know we will be in Vegas, but you must stay away from the candy shops!!!

You should go ahead a try your race diet now to see if those food will effect you in a not so good kind of way :S Also start drinking lots of water now.

Here are few helpful points I found........

In the days leading up to the race, you’ll be tapering your training, but keep eating the same amount of carbohydrates or slightly more, so that your body will store them. Don’t wait until the night before to carbo-load!

You’re better off eating lots of carbs at lunch the day before a race than at dinner. 

In the two to four hours before your race, fill up on protein and simple carbohydrates and drink lots of water or sports drink. The more time until the race, the larger your meal should be. Avoid fiber and fats, since they can cause digestion issues. Don’t try anything new on race day!

Some good pre-race foods: bread, bagel, cereal, fruit, peanut or almond butter (not too much though). The more liquid and easier-to-digest these foods are, the better.

In the hour before the race, don’t eat very much. Some water, sports drink, or energy gels are good now. I don’t even drink much water at this stage, to avoid having to use the bathroom during the race.

During a race, you need 30-60 grams of carbs per hour and about a cup of water every fifteen minutes. Avoid dangerous overhydration (hyponatremia) by drinking sports drinks with sodium and/or additional sodium supplementation. One sign of overhydration is bloating, noticable as swelling around rings, watches, socks, etc.

Hope that helps you and makes you feel better............
Was that a "healthy" blog post??? Or do I need to start discussing GMO's and stuff............

30 Day Challenge

Today is the first day of National Health Blog Post month!  We are suppose to post everyday, so lets see if we can accomplish 30 days of posts since Nov 30th we leave for our run in VEGAS! 



Today I am suppose to tell you why I write about my health.  Well, were do I begin. If you would have asked me 6 months ago about my Crohn's I would have told you the bare minimum, now I will just tell you more than you probably want to know!  I find that typing how I feel is a stress reliever in some way and it allows me to share emotions that I might not share with you in person. 

When I was diagnosed at 14 years old I was so embarassed and couldn't believe what was happening to my body.  I mean seriously, I was as pale as a ghost, weighed 72 pounds and pooped all the time.  What if I had to poop at my friend's house or even a boyfriends house??  Well I soon got over that because I realized that they didn't care or at least they didn't say anything!  And that was just the beginning of my journey.  So I write about my disease because I can and because maybe one simple statement that I say will impact you for the day or maybe make your week. I have found that small statements carry the biggest impact. 

Crohn's is an invisible disease as many call it and if you google it there is not a lot our there about how actual "Crohnies" feel or what works for them.  Well this is a chance for me to do that.  And of course have amazing support along the way.  I found this awesome blog www.forwardisapace.com ; she is an inspiration and I have yet to meet her!  Can't wait though as she is coming to Vegas for Team Challenge. 

So I promise not every blog I will talk about my Crohn's.  Dani will always add another great perspective on things I promise! 

OH...By the way, I went to my first Crohn's support group tonight with Brian. Well lets just say it was me, Brian, and 2 old men!  AWKWARD!!  Yet I can say that I will go back next month because I realized they need a "younger" figure in those groups so I can open my big mouth and spread the word about Crohn's local.  Just think, someday, I could be on TV like Pearl Jams Mike McCready or the New England Patriots retiree.  Don't keep your fingers cross =)

WE MADE IT TO $3600!

Let's just say that Halloween isn't just for scary ghosts and goblins, but it's for joy and celebration as Dani and I both met our goal on fundraising today! Words can’t express the warmth and gratitude that we have for all of you that have helped us meet our goals in both money and support.  It is amazing to have so many people patting our backs from near and far especially when some days we felt like we couldn’t do it anymore.  Now to just focus on running 13.1 miles and crossing the finish line with my best friend in less than 4 weeks!


I told myself that I would never show these pictures in public but I honestly think the time is right now.  Every dollar that you gave to Dani and myself is helping find a cure for Crohn’s.  These pics were taken 4 years ago at one of the worst points in my life and I know there are many of those days ahead of me yet somehow in my heart, I know that I’m ok because I have all of you supporting me!  People that I had no clue that support me.  This brings tears to my eyes looking at these but it also brings joy because I have realized Crohn’s doesn’t define me, its part of me!

Those scars represent a story, the story of a girl who lived years embarrased about the things that her disease was causing to happen to her body.  I made it through all that and I still continue to fight battles with my Crohn's disease all the time and darn it, I'm proud.  I'm one cool chick missing part of her intestine!

 

Now I can be open and honest about my disease and it all started a couple of months ago when I got the “guts” to run 13.1 miles J 

 

Hope everyone has a Happy Halloween! 

Monster Dash and Craft Fair

Whoa! So Im a little behind on blogging....sorry! Well, our monster dash was a HUGE success and I didnt screw up on the stop watches!!! That might be because they didnt give me one :( They know me all to well I guess!
We are so thankful for everyone that came out and ran the 5k! It was such an amazing feeling to see everyone pulling into the parking lot! Thank you to all of you who donated prizes and food! I must say, we had some pretty good ones!!!! Im not sure how I can express how much we appreciate all the help, words just are not enough!!

Then the next weekend we had a craft fair!!! A craft fair and we had NO CRAFTS!!! Im sitting in my house thinking to myself  "how the heck did we get here?" Then it dawned on me....KRISTI!! It started as "I need to start running again." To "We should do some 5ks, and collect t-shirts!" To "Hey Dani, look what I came across! We can go to Las Vegas!" So now here I am completely freaking out cause I have NOTHING to sell in this craft fair and it all Kristis fault!! Just kidding Kristi (kind of)!!
Again, Kristi and I stay up late friday night and craft away, then get up early to set up for the craft fair. It started at 9am and ended at 3pm. We were there for 7 hours and we made $55.00!!! We were so disappointed! But you know what? I actually got to sit and talk to someone for 7 hrs about absolutley nothing! It was fun in a disappointing way, if that makes sense????
That was our last fundraiser. Now I am freaking out on how to make 500 more dollars! Im at the end of the rope and I dont know what to do. Im hoping some complete stranger stops by and hands me a huge check! That would be AWESOME! But very unrealistic. We thought that the craft fair would be "it" that we would make our goal :( So I guess we must go on....we are almost there. November 15th is the deadline. I know we can do it, I have no doubts!  I see the LV lights, I see the blue and the orange lining up the strip, I hear the music playing and people cheering! I can feel the excitment and joy for what we did, it gives me goosebumps now, I cant imagine what feeling I am gonna have crossing the finish line with my best friend!

Downhill slide

Well we are currently on the downhill slide with only 6 weeks left before we run and let me just say "I'm freaking out!" but so excited at the same time.   I can't explain the type of gratitude and support that we have received from family and friends and even people we don't even know.  It is heart warming and makes me believe even stronger in what I already have my heart in. The 5k yesterday was outstanding and we couldn't have asked for better weather.  Now to find some time to craft this week for the craft fair on Saturday.  We are praying this is our last big fundraising "hoorah"! 

I don't think I ever realized how hard it would be to fundraise and find time to run on top of my already crazy schedule.  I somehow have, sometimes barely scrapping by.  I couldn't have asked for a more supportive husband and family.  My 3 children are use to me being gone or worrying about fundraising.  Lucas gave me 10 cents the other day and was so excited and said "here you go mom, its for your run".  It's so wonderful that they still love me even when some days I feel like my mind is a thousand miles away.

These last 6 weeks we need to focus on our running and me definetely my nutrition so I am physically ready to run 13.1 miles.  I have been off my steroids for about 2 weeks and feeling ok.  My new medications are working thus far so crossing my fingers they continue to do so.  If I could just get over all the fatigue I have, it would be a thousand times better! 

Once again....Thank you thank you thank you for supporting Dani and myself on this adventure and we can't wait to tell you about it when we are finished! 

A new perspective on life

Lets just say, I had a reality check that I never want to see again over the weekend.  Our baby Lane had 3 febrile seizures on Saturday evening in Spirit Lake, IA at the Ramada Inn while we were sleeping.  It was the most traumatizing thing that has happened in my life and it has made me cherish every minute of everyday.  In looking back on the past couple of days and all the thinking I was able to do due to the lack of sleep, I am grateful for what I have and have prayed more in 2 days than I have in a long time!  Lets just say, I'm going pray daily from now on! 

I want everyone to know how happy I am with all the love and support around me.  It is so heart warming to know there is always someone there even when you feel totally alone.  I know I will get over this crazy experience, it will be slow, but I will.  I just need to focus on today and move forward and be grateful Lane is still smiling. 

This is an amazing video that is well worth watching! 

3 weeks left and freaking out!

Well...we officially have only 3 weeks left of fundraising and then we can focus on running!  Dani and I are so very thankful to everyone who has donated already to this awesome cause.  We are both almost to our goal but not quite yet....So here comes the donation pitch again...Its so simple, even $10 would add up to us!  And its a tax donation!  Be sure to check out our pages and donate if you can...
https://www.active.com/donate/MNLV12/KSidel
https://www.active.com/donate/MNLV12/DTerkildsen

We decided last minute when it was only 48 degrees out not to have our rummage sale so now we have been pushing our Monster Dash 5k as well as busy making crafts for the Hartford Craft Fair at the end of the month.  Let us know if you are interested in the Monster Dash, its Sunday Oct 21st at 2pm-Costumes encouraged!!!

I can definetely say the last couple of days have been a struggle emotionally for both Dani and myself.  Thank goodness we are in this together otherwise I don't think we would be where we are at.  I have had a few select words with God and had to remind myself of what I am grateful for and appreciate everything around me.  It seems like you are so wrapped up in your crazy fast paced world that you forget about the most important thing: FAMILY!  I am so blessed with an amazing supportive family and friends and wouldn't trade them for the world.  Lily has been saving all her pennies for me to run and I just love her dedication even if she has only a $1.  It's the fact that an 8 year old worries about her mother when she has other fun things she can do!  Always remember that happiness is where you least expect it!  Have to confess: My happiness this morning was eating a donut even though I know I shouldn't have.  It was sooooooo worth it! 

Until next time.....  "Happiness Often Sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open"- John Barrymore

Crazy Week!

Well it is only Tuesday and we already have a jammed pack week ahead of us with fundraising for Team Challenge.  Thank you to everyone who came out last night to Lillians for our Diva Night!  It is greatly appreciated...I actually found a hat that fits my "LARGE" head.  I will make sure I take a picture for everyone :)  Tonight, we got our 1st Annual Monster Dash 5k Family Run/Walk approved by the city.. Its scheduled on Sunday Oct 21st at 2pm!  Let us know if your interested.  Tshirts are due by Oct 10th.  Call or email me or Dani for more information.  This Saturday we are having a rummage sale in hopes of some extra money plus to get things out of the house and then on Sunday, we are hosting a fall picture mini session!  Crazy week ahead but we can get through it together.

It is crazy how hard this can be but how enjoyable it is at the same time.  I have been struggling to find the time to juggle everything.  If I was only an octopus with 8 arms, I could do it all!  I have been slightly worried about my Crohn's and having a flare up with all this craziness going on but I am doing ok....On a new medication and weaning off of steroids...Lets just keep our fingers crossed I stay healthy.  It has been so empowering for me to talk about my disease during this fundraising process and I'm not afraid to hide it anymore.. So even when I look ok from the outside, doesn't mean I'm always feeling ok on the inside :)  Ok enough of my ranting and raving....Got some rummage stuff to look for! 

I do however want to end on this amazing quote by Coach Erin!  Love it! 

"Training is like fighting with a gorilla.  You don't stop when you're tired.  You stop when the gorilla is tired."

Time to vent.........

This week has been slightly rough on me. I am feeling very overwhelmed with everything on my plate. Kids homework, kids sports, job 1 & 2, birthday parties, full weekends, trying to squeeze in a few miles and the stress to raise almost $4,000. On the plus side I am over half way to my goal. My coaches and mentors keep telling me I'm doing great. But am I? I hope!!!, I am very thankful for the husband that I have, he has sacrificed alot of time so I can work on my goal. He is fantastic!!! Guilt is also killing me too. I feel guilty for missing out on time with the kids. Last weekend they had a babysitter all weekend!!! Talk about a knife thru the heart! I'm praying that in the end they will be proud of what I am doing. The things that keep me going....I feel great for what I am doing. It is an awesome feeling to have when your doing something for someone. It feels so great to see so many people come out and help you! It floods you with so many emotions! I know this wont be my last one, I would love to do it for other causes too. But believe me it is mentally and physically draining!! In the end, its all gonna be worth it. I see the finish line!

Thanks for listening to me! I promise that will be my last breakdown....o.k. probably not. But I will try and keep them to a minimum!!!       D

#3 Golf for Team Challenge

Well what do you know....I had nothing to be nervous about at all!! We had 8 teams come out and support us! I was amazed, shocked, overwhelmed and very thankful. I had perma grin the whole 18 holes. We raised $480.00 yesterday because the winning teams decided to donate it back.  Thank you so much!! If you are wondering.....no, I was not on the winning team. I was on the FUNNEST team :) I only lost one ball all day and that's probably cause the water is so low in the ponds they were easy to retrieve.........d

                                                  Kristi's Team

                                             Thanks Travis for helping us organize this

                                                   My Team

                                            Some of the people that came out to support Team Challenge

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!
Our next fundraiser is Oct.1st at lilllians in Sioux Falls. Hope to see you all there!